This blog is more for me than you. In the last couple months, everyone in my inner circle has had a significant shift, resulting in leaving personal relationships, jobs, or locations. It’s like the lessons were finally learned, and it was just time to release old patterns that no longer serve the highest good. I also had some shifting in relationships, and thought I was right on track. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that evolution is always moving… there’s always more.
I was recently spending time with some of my Tribe, feeling proud of them for all the toxic programs they have released. They are all leaving various levels of abusive situations, and I found myself being a bit jealous. My relationship with my body has been difficult for almost two decades, after a diagnosis of a genetic, degenerative, neurological disorder called Friedreich’s Ataxia. Why can’t I leave my abusive relationship with my body? What would that look like? Is it really abusive? Asking questions always brings me insight.
During this same time, I was reminded that I take on other’s energy, and (coincidentally and unrelated) I was given a book. I don’t actually take on energy anymore, but I definitely act as an air filter, clearing the energy around me. I’ve done it for so long, I don’t even notice, unless it’s pointed out. Is that just who I am? Just what I do? Then I sat down to read my gift of The Mature Empath by Tracy Roe. It’s amazing how hearing someone else’s words, on a subject that’s familiar, can jog the memory in a whole new way.
I am aware that “fixing” is totally different from “healing”. I am also aware that people need to be allowed to struggle to find their personal power. I know that letting people live with their choices develops their masculine power. I know this on an individual level. I just didn’t apply all this to the collective consciousness, which is where I do most of my work for the Ascension.
For years, I have been both grounding the new energy, and transmuting the old. I’ve basically been an air filter for the negative energies of the collective. This relationship no longer serves either of us. My body was the one suffering the abuse of my free will running old energy through it. All the time. No wonder my nervous system is shot. So, this is my big break-up. I’m breaking up with the collective consciousness. I’m no longer helping to cleanse the collective. I trust it is strong enough to do it on its own. It’s time.
My new job will only be to ground the new energies. It’s hard to end an old relationship like this, but we’ll both be healthier for it. I feel better already.